


leave me alone

by 80slieberher



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, M/M, Yeah i think thats it, i dont really like it, this is kind of stupid, uhhh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-03-25
Packaged: 2019-04-07 23:30:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14092095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/80slieberher/pseuds/80slieberher
Summary: tumblr prompt request - 1. “Give me a chance.” 3. “Leave me alone.” 27. “I wish I’d never met you.” - Stenbrough





	leave me alone

**Author's Note:**

> this is like. gross and i don't really like it i might delete it idk hhhhh

Stan wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans as he paced around his room, waiting for the knock on the door that would signal Bill’s arrival. He wished he could prolong it forever - though waiting in this anxiety seemed to be the same sort of hell.

Bill had told him he wanted to talk earlier that day, at lunch, when they would usually spend that free time making out in the bathroom. It was one thing for Bill to refuse that, but a whole other ordeal to offer to come to Stan’s house after school just to talk to him.

Stan swallowed hard and tried to push down his nerves with it when he heard the knock on the front door. He was glad his parents weren’t home, though he sort of wished they were if only to give him an excuse not to do this. But he knew somewhere that Bill would find a way to get what he wanted anyway - he always did.

He contemplated just not answering and pretending no one was home - but where would that get him? At least maybe through whatever was about to happen, he could find out why Bill had been acting so weird the past week.

The doorknob was cold under his fingers, but he turned it anyway, revelling a sodden-looking Bill Denbrough in the doorway.

“We nuh-nneed to talk,” He repeated his words from earlier, “Can I cuh-hh-ome in?”

“Uh, yeah,” Stan stepped to the side, already feeling like an idiot. “What’s up?”

Bill stepped through and past him, and went to pacing in his living room as Stan had been in his room minutes earlier. “We cah-han’t keep doing thu-th-this.”

“Doing what?” Stan played dumb. Hooking up. He meant hooking up but Stan wasn’t going to let him know that he meant that because Stan wanted to the delay the point of this conversation for as long as possible. He was most definitely stalling.

“All thuh-th-this sneaking around,” Bill rubbed at his temples, “Muh-m-making out in bathrooms six t-tuh-times a day.” He paused, as if searching for the right words to say, and then went on. Stan watched him with wide eyes all the while - analysing, trying to decipher what he was getting at. “Th-that’s not whah-hat I want.”

“So you don’t want to hook up anymore, is what you’re saying,” Stan assumed, trying his best to read between the lines.

“Yuh-,” Bill started, but bit his lip, “I mean, n-nn-no, not exac-actly.” He took a deep breath. “I came out to muh-m-my parents last week.”

Oh.

“I hah-have feelings for you, Stan.”

Oh.

“And I th-thhhink that if you just phuh-phrased it the right way, your parents would und-und-understand-,”

“No,” Stan cut in, turning away from Bill’s blue eyes that felt like the looked into his soul sometimes, “I’m glad your parents are cool with you being bi and all, Bill, really I am - but I don’t know how mine will react. Especially not my father. You know how I feel about this-,”

“H-he loves you, Stan, you buh-being bi isn’t going to chu-change-,” Bill reached for his hand gentle, but Stan was faster and moved away, almost backing away from Bill.

“I don’t care,” He shook his head, “That’s not what _I_  want.”

Bill took careful steps toward him. “Okay,” He took another breath and began to try to compromise. “Ok-kay, then we don’t huh-hhhave to jump into anyth-thing and come out rrright away. We c-c-can just- Would yuh-you want to go on a duh-date?” God, of course Bill would wait until now to ask him. Until now when Stan was backing away from him and going on dates with him was last on his to-do list - though it’d been high up on there since the start of their little affair.

“We’re not dating, we’re not going to date,” Stan sighed but kept the edge in his voice, “I can’t tell them and you’re going to make me.”

“St-Stan,” Bill’s voice broke, “I’m not guh-hoing to make you do anyth-thing,” His voice was sorrowful, like he regretted this entire decision. Good, Stan did, too. Stan regretted Bill’s choice enough for the both of them. “I juh-hust wanted what’s buh-b-best for you-,”

“Don’t give me that,” Stan felt his own demeanor change quickly, crossing his arms over his chest. How dare Bill try to hide his blatantly selfishness under a flimsy disguise - as if Stan can’t see? “You wanted me to come out for you, Bill. Not for me. I know you want us to be together, but we can’t. That’s why we’re doing this.”

“So you d-don’t want us tuh-t-t-to be together?” Stan could hear the emotion in Bill’s voice now, foiling the sharp coldness of his own. He saw hit Bite his cheek.

“Not like this,” Stan answered, looking to his feet. They’d made their way into his kitchen on accident, and Stan stood behind a counter while Bill stoof maybe four feet from him, if Stan was making a rough estimate.

“You wuh-won’t even give ih-hit a chance, Stan,” Bill half-pleaded, half-accused. “Y-yuh-ou won’t guh-give us a chance,” He stepped forward again. “J-j-just give me a chance?”

Stan pressed his back into the counter, like he could back up any farther. “Get out.”

He peered through squinted eyes at Bill, who looked surprised.

“Wh- What?”

“Get out, Bill,” He pointed to the door, “Leave me alone.”

Bill blinked a moment, but didn’t say another word as he straightened himself out. Stan watched him walk to the door, watched him open and close it again behind him.

“I wish I’d nuh-never met y-you,” He swore he heard Bill utter, just as the door latched shut behind his heels. 


End file.
